Art of Loving Advice
Question:
I have been searching high and low for info. on non-sexual intimacy . To me, this refers to the loving actions between partners that may lead to sexual experience , but it's actions are non sexual in nature . I want to teach my MR. how to be loving to me and not have the utter focus of sex . I have tried showing him , telling him and even touching him in the manner which I wish to be touched . I want us to learn together about the emotional side of intimacy . I want sex to be more heart felt than orgasmic for me . I want ideas and frank talk of what can be done to close the gap on horny and open up the doors to passion , non sexual intimacy , and emotion . I am looking for books , letters , pamphlets , illustrations ...............whatever I can get me emotionally hungry hands on !! My MR. and I waited to become sexual , and since becomming sexual , I have been trying to get him to understand that my sexual needs begin with non sexual behavior from him. A concept not easily grasped by him . Please help . I love him , but he is on the way to " rocking me" right out of his world because he doesn't get how to cradle me in it ! . I am feeling more and more lonely and desperate . I want to help him understand that for me , sexuality starts with the intimacy created BEFORE we go to bed . Can you help ??
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There are many articles on my web site that address this issue. I would encourage you to visit www.artofloving.com again and take some time to read the many articles posted. I would suggest you read Partnering by Hal & Sidra Stone. You will find this book in book section of my site.
You need to have a heart to heart talk with your man and express your feelings. Tell him how you feel!!! I would suggest seeking some therapy together to resolve these intimacy problems.
Paul Mauchline,
The Art of Loving Institute
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