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Art of Loving Advice Im 20 and I've been going out with a guy (also 20) for about 4 months and its going really well. Now the problem is that i'm leaving the country soon, in a month in fact, to return home to my country to finish the final year of my college degree. He has said several times that he'd love to come join me and work in my country, as he has no ties here, and he'd like to improve his english a lot, but at the moment i just dont see him doing anything about it. I do believe that he really wants to go, but right now he is between jobs and hasnt got much money. Im sure he will find one within the next few weeks, but I'd really like to get a straight answer from him about whether he has even thought about what he wants to do. I dont want to be a nag, but I feel I have a right to know. For me, continuing a relationship when there is a strong possibility that it will end within the next month (because i have to leave) seems pointless. I dont have a problem generally with living for the moment, but i do have a problem with getting hurt. He is a good person and i believe him when he says he cares for me, i know he is not the type to use a girl. So, how do i go about asking him this question and getting an answer without pressurising him, or making him feel i dont trust him? Do i need to wait longer? Please help! |
 Expressing your honest feelings is the only way to go in my opinion. Moving to another country is a big decision. Maybe he needs more time to make such an important change in his life. Distance does in most cases make the heart grow fonder. I would suggest you get on with your life, and see what happens. Your relationship is only four months old -- give it some time to mature, and allow it to grow. Should it end, hold to the happy memories -- not the hurt. Hurt in my opinion is just a by-product of fear. It is your choice whether you want love in your life or fear. I myself choose LOVE!! |
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